Traditionally, people get one wish per birthday cake. But no one has ever accused me of being "traditional."
Since this October 23 marks a particular milestone for me, I decided to consult The Great-and-Powerful Birthday Genie to see if I'm due any special perks for turning 65. (It can't hurt to ask, right?) Well, guess what happened? The Birthday Genie is granting me 65 wishes!
You may not believe this, but writing my wishlist wasn't easy.
The first dozen wishes were a breeze, but 65? It took some real thinking on my part (as if my brain isn't already cluttered enough with plot twists, medical appointments, and Honey-Do lists), but I managed to muddle through. I am a creative writer, after all!
The Birthday Genie is like Santa with lots of helpers. If you can, please help me fulfill my deepest desires:
Peace on Earth.
Love and Light.
Kindness and Compassion.
Many more wonderful years with my darling husband, Nick. (He would probably wonder why he's not Number One on the list, but who can compete with Peace on Earth?)
The highest good for my family, friends, and neighbors.
Good physical, mental, and emotional health.
Discipline and strength to stop judging people.
Loving homes for every dog and cat on the planet.
Loving homes for every human on the planet.
Rainbows. (If you've ever listened to my podcast, you know it had to be there.)
Clear skies. (With no chemtrails, thank you very much!)
Clean, drinkable water for everyone.
The end of landfills and waste.
A fair and safe election.
A world free of illness and disease.
A complete do-over for the year 2020.
More gorgeous sunrises and sunsets.
A closet full of colorful clothing in one size only.
Houses that clean themselves.
All the time in the world to write.
All the time in the world to read.
More belly laughs. (And a smaller belly!)
A class that will teach me how to speak Cat. (I pretend I know how, but our cats ignore me!)
Hollywood to stop producing remakes. (Contact me—I have original screenplays!)
A vacation to a place that is Autumn year-round. (All planets considered!)
Apple cider donuts that don't make me fat. (Or any flavor, for that matter.)
Sidewalks without cracks (to break my poor Mommy's back!)
An acupressure point I can press so I can speak fluent Italian again.
A pack of that three-course flavor-changing gum from Charlie and the Chocolate Factory by Roald Dahl. (I'm greedy. Make that two packs!)
The manufacturers of 7-up and Sara Lee cheesecake to return to their original formulas. (I'm all for experimentation, but what the heck were you thinking?!)
Virtual gynecology exams. (That speculum is never warm enough!)
Flying cars like they had on The Jetsons.
A return to Golden Atlantis. (I could use a session in that crystal healing temple!)
A gadget that prevents me from falling asleep while listening to an audiobook.
A trip to Inn Lak'ech for real, not just in my mind.
A revisit to Newport, Rhode Island on October 9, 1994, the day I married Nick aboard the Madeleine. (Best wedding ever!)
The entire chakra collection of crystal singing bowls. (And a room to put them.)
A real houseplant that never dies.
A Zoom meeting with my favorite deceased authors. (Are you listening, Maya Angelou, Jane Austen, Marion Zimmer Bradley, Charlotte Bronte, Louisa May Alcott, Charles Dickens, Rosamunde Pilcher, and James Steinbeck?)
Unlimited energy so I can sit around and do nothing. (Uh, what's that?)
A fabulous home-cooked meal with the always cute Ina and Jeffrey Garten at their home in East Hampton. (I wouldn't mind living in their home, either.)
A Hallmark Christmas movie set in Massachusetts that was actually shot in Massachusetts, not Canada. (We New Englanders can tell, you know.)
Poldark to return to BBC and never go off the air. (And don't you dare even think of replacing that smoldering Aidan Turner as Ross Poldark!)
A party with mattress surfing like they had in The Princess Diaries: Part 2.
A rejuvenating color therapy station at every Interstate rest area.
A horse that can talk like Mister Ed, except with Fabio's sexy voice!
Oral surgeons to find a painless subsitute for injection needles. (Maybe a sugar cube?)
A way I could hang out with Cher without looking like a fan girl. (I've always thought she was the coolest, best-dressed, and most original performer.)
A smoother transition to the 5th Dimension. (Less emotional turmoil, please.)
Frozen vegetarian meals that taste exactly like New England clam chowder, broiled scallops, baked stuffed shrimp, and lobster rolls.
Many more seaglass excursions on the beach. (I need to find that elusive Violet shard!)
Respect for writers and the craft of writing.
Kitty litter that not only cleans itself automatically, but transfers the old litter to the outside garbage can, too.
My own houseboat where I can write on the water whenever I want. (I thought about christening her Easy Writer, but that might give people the wrong impression.)
A Native woman to become president during my lifetime.
A C-pap mask that never leaks. (Better yet, no more sleep apnea!)
An end to all those National Grid robo calls.
A television marathon of The West Wing, Ally McBeal, Dawson's Creek, and The Gilmore Girls. (Great ensemble casts!)
A private audience with Her Majesty, The Queen. (I thought we'd just sit, drink tea, eat crumpets, and chat. "So, Elizabeth, if you weren't doing all this reigning and waving stuff, what would you be? And have you ever worn your crown to bed? Asking for a friend!")
Miniature mermaids (1" to 2" tall) to add to the one-inch scale replica of the Sea Angels shop I'm building. (It's one of my favorite places in my novel, Inn Lak'ech.)
A gift certificate to the Saltitude Himalayan Salt Cave in Lincoln, Rhode Island.
Loving donations to support the global efforts of Color Therapy Month.